Tears of blood

The drink meet lies upon the smooth, flat, varnished circuit board where the suns reflection casts an eerie shadow of the ice, shivery drink. If you glance closely, the peeing densification slowly, slides, straight down the can leaving a puddle of water behind. To you this may sympathizem like an ordinary alcoholic drink, scarcely for unrivaled girl it is her deepest fears come trueIm floatingIm soa crowdover better-looking fresh, green fields and past busy cities. The wind is automobilerying me to my dreams on the horizon. The introduction is spinning below me, such beauty from above. Im floating Im soaring by dint of the soft, duvet of white clouds. The world, in each(prenominal) its pollution, poverty and corruption, is still dishy. Which means, Im beautiful behind my scars and faults and insecurities yes I am still beautiful.She sat on the rim of her blue-patched bed, thinking, This is my sanctuary. For those a couple of(prenominal) moments of silence going with her mind, she felt cipher could destroy this utterly perfect feeling. Nothing, nothing could bring her down from her holy, senior high school of freedom.I am air. I am nobody. I am free.But, to her sharp horror, What I dont understandShe started jerking clog up to the cold, hosti illuminatedy, of real life. Good-morning to you all, on this graceful Thurs daylight. The suns out and the birds are singing. So why not win a chance of a lifetime 2 weeks in Italy plainly ring up0800800958&8243 She suddenly remembered her dream, and that word, dream, haunts her.It was just a dream, everything is just now ever a dream. She thought as she sighed, and looked around to what her life was. A tiny room, with just nigh enough space to stand up in, but to her that wasnt grave this was her sanctuary. She comes up here everyday and locks herself in her room, crying, trying to run external from all the evil and betrayals, which go on downstairs. After a few moments, she slowly managed to drag herself out of bed and stumble into the bathroom. The lingering report of sleep pulled down her eyelids as she looks in the mirror. Another morning, another day g bingle by she thought.TAMICA shrilled a woman in her late forties.Yes, mother she replied.If you dont cover hurry up youll be late for school, and dont expect me to be denture when the school rings wondering where you are. By the way, its your responsibility to make incontestable your so called mystify does not leave the house drunk with the car keys and make sure all the back doors are locked when you come back from school, I dont want your father making a show of himself, mute?Ill see, depends init she replied with a since of insecurity. What on earth to you mean Ill see, you do what ever I say or do not except food in the evening. It is your fault he drinks anyway.By that time, she had, had enough. Tamika knew if see throwed her mouth anymore she just end up crying first thing in the morning. So she hurried dow nstairs and walked out the house without any breakfast. With her take aim down by means ofout the entire journey from home to school, thinking about how possibly it could be her fault her father drinks himself stupid everyday age passed by so fast that before and she knew it, it was three oclock. She slowly walked through the quiet, dark streets dreading what would happen to her when she got home. As she got closer, and closer before she reached the two social lion statues outside what seemed to be a peaceful, loving home. It seemed to her that the lions were protectors of her home. They sit outside day in day out protecting the house from predators, except what they do not k right away is that the predators are already inside waiting for a piece of innocent flesh.She bravely built up the courage to acetify the exhausting, cold key to open the front door. Then, all of a sudden she could hear the taunt of the piano in the background, and fearful greenish watery took over her bo dy like adrenaline. It started feet first moving slowly and sorely up her spine, sending shivers to her brain. She opened her eyes, to find broken glass and tender all over the kitchen floor, and there in the far distance was her father. He was five foot five with white hair with a lifesize beer belly. From the far distance, he looked perfectly normal but as she took a step closer she could see the cold can of beer in his sight and beside him lay a mountain of empty cans. She looked around at gageI cant take it, I have had enoughaaaaarrrrrrgggShe slowly assay walking towards the stairs, trying ever so hard not to be noticed by the predator. She had to be quiet as a mouse, but at the same time as, sly as a fox.She took genius giant leap up. She could feel the stairs changing into what seemed to be an escalator clause and it was going up She took a looked up only to find she could see soft duvet of velvet clouds covering the suns rays. This leaded to her sanctuary. She took one bulky, hard glimpse down at the broken home.Inside her dimly lit room she sat numbly listening to the soft sounds coming from her radio. So much emotions and thoughts were playing through Tamikas mind. All the horrible things her mother tell about her to her face and behind her back, and just looking at her father like that everyday, tops it up. Her friends dogs were better parents then they wear. A small quartz clear tear fell down her left cheek. She knew what she had to do to trace ride of such pain and emotion. She went to the cupboard, slowly opened the first adjourn and hidden on top were no one could see was a dull, dirty, dark brown magnet but it was not the magnet, which would release all the pain, it was underneath the magnet that was so important. A small, shimmering, sharp stigma just lay there.How can such a small object serve such pain in the world?Tamica surveyd, silently at the blade. With no thought to what she was doing the sharp lustrous edge slid, smooth ly into her pale whittle she watched absent-mindedly as a steady dribble of cherry red farm animal drawled gradually down the side of her wrist. As she pushed the blade in deeper, the germinate of subscriber line right away intensified. The surge of anguish caused her to cringe. A chorus of haggle went through her mindPain, Pain, go away,Let me smile for just one day,Should that day I never see,Let my blood run cold and freeWith each new drop, the circle of blood grew proving that she was serious. There were now six cuts her wrists each as deep as each other, and only millimetres apart. Her blood- stained fingers reached for the once shiny, silver blade, which was now covers in dark blood. She contemplated her adjoining move. She pressed with the strongest amount of force she had inside her. This had given her more blood and pain then the others, but the scars were massive and impossible to conceal. After a few minutes the bloody blade broke through her uncase slowly and a n ew thick red line quickly appeared. A wave of relief gushed through her body and escaped through her disfigured wrist. She laid back closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of smash relief.All her emotions and thoughts cleared. But nevertheless she knew this sensation would be over in a matter of seconds. She would have trouble walking tomorrow, but Tamica never thought that far ahead. As she gazed down at her disfigured limb, she was revolted, repulsed and humiliated that she could do such a thing. Then as she continued to stare another feeling had surface. The feeling of pride. She swiped the area where the blood was now drying and watched in astonishment as fresh cherry red blood drizzled from her open wounds. A renewed sense of relief consumed her. She had been cutting for so long now that she had lost sight of reality. She no longer controlled the blade, but the blade control her